I’m so sorry to hear that. The devolvement of a relationship/marriage is SO painful, and it’s impactful in so many ways. I’m in the middle of writing an article about how I survived the end of mine, because that’s what it is for a time: surviving. It DOES get better. There are also support groups (one I tried out was called DivorceCare) that can help explain what’s normal and not normal. Good luck to you in however that needs to look.