Reading this has made me have a lot of similar wonderings on my own marriage. “His low sex drive, even back when we were dating; his constant rejection of my sexual advances after we were married” was really what jumped out to me. My own ex-husband had a low sex drive plus performance and refused my advances constantly. My self-esteem was deeply affected by this, and I still struggle dealing with sexual rejection with my current partner, even though it’s literally only happened once the entire time we’ve been together. I have my own and somewhat his reasoning for this (he was hiding his drug addiction and lying to me, so whatever he was taking and the fact that he was lying to his romantic partner probably didn’t help his drive and performance. He also told me that he didn’t want to have sex when he knew he’d been using), but it still makes me wonder and something I’ll probably wonder for a while to come. Thanks for writing this!