The Allure of the Bad Boy

Cishet women self-report that they want good genes, economic investment, parenting proclivities, and emotional commitment, so why do we always love the bad boys?

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Taken from Danielle Henderson’s Feminist Ryan Gosling

1. You are an emotional adrenaline junkie.

Bad boys are always a little jittery, a little live-wirey, a lot unpredictable. You can hear the thunder, but never know where the lightning is going to strike.

2. You know he has so much potential.

It’s always that fairy tale crap. You think he hasn’t met the right person. He’s listless, unfocused, drinks too much, doesn’t have the right job, and/or has some issues he needs to work out on a therapist’s couch.

3. You are afraid of commitment.

People who are afraid of commitment often attempt to commit to people who are inappropriate or unavailable. They choose them specifically because they subconsciously know a long-term relationship isn’t possible with them.

4. You’re ovulating.

I hate even writing that because it reads so incredibly sexist. Hormones are going to make women like bad boys?? But we are animals and thus are not immune to our bodies’ responses. In a study by Christina M. Larson and others, it was found that women are more attracted to “masculine” or “alpha” males during the ovulatory part of their cycle. The conclusion is that women (and other female animals) are drawn to “males with traits associated with fit genes that they can pass on to their offspring.”

5. You’re young.

Sigal Tifferet and Daniel J. Kruger in their study surveyed 1,365 women, ranging in age from 14 to 68, about their preferences in a male partner. The women were asked to rate how likely they would be to have a long-term or short-term sexual relationship with a “dad” or “cad.”

When the pain of staying the same is greater than the pain of changing, you’ll change, and with that change, will come a greater focus on bringing someone special into your life who has the exact qualities you desire.

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Written by

Relationship Coach & Writer. Check out my books, courses, & other work at tarablairball.substack.com. E-mail: tarablairball@gmail.com IG: @tarablairball

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